Entertaining Crimes in Japan Awards, 2008 edition

1. “Mayonnaise Bandits” : a story of two 16 year olds squirting mayonnaise at passers-by in order to grab their bags. There have been 19 cases reported in two days!

2. “Tokyo fireman arrested for stealing underwear from a woman’s apartment” : I was kind of expecting it to be all ladder climbing, window breaking type of thing, but according to the fireman he just confused the apartment with that of his friend and the front door was unlocked… oh, he was also caught intoxicated, with two pairs of underwear in hand.

3. “Postman arrested for ditching mail in Wakayama”: the guy failed to deliver 101 postcards and letters, hiding it in some unoccupied house since… January (last year, that is). It says the letters were found undamaged, so they will be delivered to the recipients.

4. “Man arrested for filming up woman’s skirt”: check this out: “Police seized his cell phone and found about 620 similar images and videos, and will pursue further charges. Okuda was quoted by police as saying: “I’ve been coming to crowded places where there are lots of women wearing short skirts for about two years now. I read up on techniques on the Internet.”

5. “Officer in anti-drunken driving campaign fired for drunken driving“: it’s a pity this story is “expired”, but nevertheless, the headline looks good.

Japan’s Tourism Ambassador…Hello Kitty!

Check out this curious story about the new Japan’s Tourism Ambassador...Hello Kitty.

What’s most interesting is that the reason to put Hello Kitty as Japan Tourism Ambassador is because of its widespread popularity among children and young women in China and Hong Kong.

And the role of this Tourism Ambassador position is supposedly to increase tourism…

…so, being pretty open about who we’d like to see more of coming to Japan, eh?

Judging from this man’s face he’s already thinking about a bunch of young Chinese women in mini skirts strolling around his office…  :)

Why the Japanese don’t shave

OK, now this is something that often takes many a gaijin by surprise, especially when it comes to western men having sexual encounters with Japanese women. Indeed, neither women nor men tend to care for their intimate zones to the extent that us, foreigners, do. I guess, it comes like such a shock because we are so used to seeing picture perfect Japanese, armed with numerous makeup tools, shamelessly doing touch-ups on the trains, escalators and whatnot, so it’s natural you’d think with such an importance placed on appearance, they’d go all the way.

But, alas, the reality is very different.

Perhaps, one of the reasons hides in the tradition of the onsen? The public hot spring baths are usually entered wearing nothing but your own fur. On the other hand, the Japanese are also known for being rather shy and express a strong undesirability towards nudity. For example, it is considered rude to flash your belly and you’ll rarely see deep cleavages during the day (the Japanese miniskirt tends to be a phenomenon though).

So perhaps, in order to enjoy the pleasures of the onsen with minimum embarassement, it is crucial to keep all you’ve got to cover yourself as much as possible. But on the other hand, why didn’t it become more common to wear bathing suits in the onsen?

And moreover, there is a rather strong preference in the Japanese society to adapt, rather than to stand out. In fact, you should want to avoid to stand out at any cost. According to a female Japanese friend of mine, if you do enter an onsen or a similar setting with a “brazilian”, people would most likely question your choice, seek for an explanation of such an extraordinary behaviour. Moreover, quite possibly others would feel intimidated by such an outrage and as a Japanese, you would want to avoid that by all means, right?

Since I haven’t had a chance myself to enter an onsen yet, I’m curious if foreigners feel the same pressure to “cover up”? Do you get curious, or perhaps even reproachful, looks…?

EVEN MONKEYS LIKE TO “COVER IT UP” IN THE ONSEN :)

Onsen (hiragana:おんせん; kanji: 温泉) is a Japanese hot spring. Soaking in an onsen is a common way to relax after a workout, hence onsens are rather popular in skiing resorts and sometimes even in gyms! I guess the only downturn on bathing in an onsen is that the warm water is a good way to transmit infections, like the Athlete’s foot and such.

よろしくおねがいします！

I am a gaijin. I come from Europe, and speak so little Japanese, that I actually take pride in writing the title of this blog in kanji.

Since living in Japan is full of awkward, funny or plain disturbing experiences, I would like to share them with those who have the hots for Japan through a safe distance of thousands of kilometres, but nevertheless want to get some inside scoop.

And of course, those, who are going through a similar period of gaijin-hood and seek to share their exciting experiences. Like, when I’ll be writing a post “Why no one shaves in Japan”, perhaps you’ll be the one nodding enthusiastically, saying “YES!!!YES!!! I noticed that too!!!! Let me tell you my story…”, which I am very curious to hear! Afterall, being a gaijin in Japan at times makes you long for some sort of AA type of group counselling, right?

Well, and at the end of each post I’ll include some translations of the too-cool-for-school phrases, for those less familiar with the local slang:

Gaijin (kanji: 外人; hiragana: がいじん) is a shorter and slightly slangy version of the word “gaikokujin” (kanji: 外国人; hiragana: がいこくじん) meaning “foreigner”. Often heard in combination with “baka” (kanji:馬鹿 (horse + deer); hiragana:ばか) meaning “idiot, fool”. I say that loudly to my gaijin friends when they struggle with their suica cards…and watch the Japanese reactions. Few can keep a straight face! Some even look mortified. They probably think I read their minds.